Adoption News

ADOPTED SISTERS MAKE FAMILY COMPLETE

March 31, 2005

PHOTO CAPTION: Molly McGarvey, 7, recently gained three sisters from Moldova: Elizabeth, 6, Kate, 4, and Colleen, 2.

Laura McGarvey will be the first to tell you that she and her husband John had no idea they'd be parents to four adopted daughters. "We knew we wanted to expand our family, and Molly, our first daughter, kept asking about a brother or sister," McGarvey said. "It wasn't until the end of 2003 that we finally decided to put our minds to it and call our adoption agency to put the process in motion."

The McGarvey's decided to try international adoption. The number of international adoptions is growing. The Immigration and Natural-ization Service reports the number of foreign adoptions has increased from 7,000 five years ago to more than 16,000 in 2004. In 2004, Lutheran Social Services of New England (LSS) assisted several Central Connecticut families with international adoptions.

McGarvey explained how the opportunity to adopt three girls, ages 2, 4 and 6, was presented to them.

"We got a call from Jen Phillips, our social worker from Lutheran Family Services. She knew we were looking for a child close in age to our seven-year-old daughter Molly, and she knew we were open to the possibility of a sibling group if one became available."

The McGarveys were told about three sisters living in a private Moldovan (Romanian) orphanage. They weren't even sure they knew where Moldova was.

"After seeing the referral, and learning more about them, we began to seriously consider the possibility," McGarvey said.

It wasn't until they felt more certain about the idea that the McGarveys shared their thoughts with Molly.

"The very first thing we did was ask: if she had her wish, how many sisters would she want? She thought for a moment and said, "Three!"

Many adoptive parents say their adoption journey is one lead by fate and an inevitable feeling that their adoptive child was meant for them. The McGarvey's are no exception.

Like thousands of other American families, their adoption journey took them halfway around the world to a country once part of the former Soviet Union, where people spoke a foreign language.

They've been back home since December of last year, and the girls already have begun to replace much of their Romanian with English.

"Theirs isn't your typical adoption story," said Jen Phillips, social worker for LSS.

"Most of our families who travel overseas to China, Ukraine or one of the other eight countries where we have adoption programs, come home with a baby in their arms, not three, all walking and talking in a foreign language. That's what makes The McGarvey's adoption story so wonderful."

Elizabeth McGarvey is six and refuses to say anything unless she can say it in English, McGarvey said. "She's doing well with children her age in first grade," she added.

Four-year-old daughter Kate is attending pre-school and two-year-old Colleen stays at home with McGarvey.

What's it like to be mom to these new daughters?

"They're so independent," McGarvey said. "They get up in the morning and dress themselves. And you won't find three children more affectionate. They're always throwing their arms around us, offering hugs."

Life in the private orphanage, where a staff of 12 cared for the girls, was better than in most Moldovan orphanages. Yet the girls longed for a mother and father.

"We arrived back home at 1:30 in the morning," said McGarvey, "and when we woke Molly to meet her sisters, her face lit up with the biggest smile. She's so much more content now that she has sisters."

Phillips puts the McGarvey's story into the larger perspective on adoption.

"Our agency works with so many families from Connecticut and around the country," she said. And no matter how many families you help, each has their own unique adoption story. Even though most adoptions aren't as bountiful as the McGarvey's, the ending is always a joyous one."

LSS, located in Rocky Hill, has been finding home for families of all faiths for over 135 years. LSS offers domestic and international adoption programs and birth parent services.

Adoption information sessions are held the first Wednesday of every month in their Rocky Hill office. For information call 800-286-9899 or visit www.AdoptLSS.org .